Some men won't even consider dating a woman if she refuses to give head. "I always make sure to ask for a blow job the first time we get naked," says another friend. "That way if she says no, I can stop dating her before we get too serious." Women who don't like it complain that it takes too long, is uncomfortable and tastes funny. Men complain that they don't get it as often as they'd like, and when they do, it doesn't last long enough. Ah, fellatio: the relationship deal breaker.

The Basics

Get prepared before you start. Set the mood by dimming the lights or setting soft music. You might want to light some incense also, we recommend Arousal Pheromone Incense. This incense contains pheromones which is the natural chemical substance secreted by humans to elicit response and attract members of the opposite sex. Many people have reported that their partners are instantly set in the mood when this incense is used.

Get comfortable. You don't want to be in a bad position while performing this act, as it's very disruptive to both parties, and can not only ruin the moment, but make the experience less enjoyable for the you, the giver. A good position to start is kneeling so your mouth is slightly lower than his penis, as you have good control, and if you tilt your head back when he cums, the semen will go right down your throat without much effort on your part. This also helps the taste issue.

A good basic motion is to place your hand against your mouth and move them in an up and down motion together. This gives the whole penis stimulation, while giving the head the most pleasurable stimulation with your mouth. Make sure when you come up and down, that your thumb and forefinger go over the head. There is a small ridge of skin on the underside of the penis directly below the head called the frenulum, which is extremely sensitive. Make sure your thumb strokes this in that movement.

Vary your movements, as the same motion for too long will desensitize your partner. Play with it! Make it fun! Lick it, kiss it, nibble it, suck it, blow on it, run your tongue up the entire shaft while looking up at him, and don't neglect the testicles! They are quite sensitive to touch, especially from your mouth, and most men love some kind of stimulation here. Also, a little teasing by kissing other areas of the body such as the inner thighs is quite exciting.

A lot of women are afraid to apply pressure to the penis, as they think it is very delicate. While you don't want to be too rough, it is pretty flexible, so just use good judgment. The testicles, on the other hand, I would be extremely gentle with.

Don't use your teeth, unless you know your partner likes it. Some men like it when you gently run your teeth up the shaft occasionally. Keep your lips over your teeth, and try to be aware of this as you are performing.

Teach your throat to relax. A lot of women have trouble with blowjobs because it makes them gag, and this is easily remedied. All you need is a little practice. Get a dildo, a carrot, a zucchini, or something, and practice with it by letting it touch the back of your throat upon insertion. It will take several tries, but you will soon learn how to relax, greatly improving your blowjob skills. Eventually, you will be able to have anything touch the back of your throat, a finger, a pen, and yes, a cock, without any reflex. When you have mastered this, your man will thank you, as I have not yet met one that did not like to feel his whole penis in someone's mouth. In fact, some men can get off quickly just by making the head touch the back of your throat repeatedly. If you just aren't having luck, you can always try numbing gel, but apply it to your mouth, not the organ.

Five Minutes or Less - It Can Be Done!

Again, make sure you are comfortable! Begin by gently stroking, kissing and blowing on the area around the penis: the testicles, inner thighs and lower belly. The point in the beginning is to get him so hard for you that he anticipates every movement. Your first move should be exciting and fun, like taking the entire length in one swoop, taking just the head, licking lightly up the shaft or placing a kiss on the head.

With the entire penis in your mouth, apply gentle suction with the back and top parts of your mouth while moving your tongue around on the frenulum. Don't do this for long, just get comfortable with the motion and give him a taste of what's to come.

Play with the penis for about two minutes. Kiss, lick, tease, mouth and stroke it. Do the same for the testicles. Have fun. Vary your technique from moment to moment to get him so hot he can't stop wiggling. Begin fellating in earnest: using an up-and-down motion, simulate vaginal intercourse with your mouth. Apply gentle pressure and suction and use your tongue, but continue in the up-and-down motion. You are preparing him for an orgasm.

Wrap one of your hands around the base of his penis just beneath your mouth. As you increase your tempo, squeeze his penis and stroke his shaft with your hand in the same rhythmic motion as you are using with your mouth. Fondle his testicles with your other hand. Get a steady rhythm going and don't vary it. Keeping the rhythm and hand involvement constant, add the "finale" suction and frenulum tonguing. He should cum after about a minute of this.

Some other ways I have found to do quickies: Do the "basic motion" described in the first section fairly quickly, only use a very light touch with your hand. The light touch over the frenulum can be extremely exciting to some men; As briefly mentioned in the first section, take in the entire length, letting the head touch the back of your throat. Doing this repeatedly as your entire act can send a man into orgasm in under two minutes, if he is particularly sensitive to this! Remember to pay attention to what gets your partner hot, and use that to get him to orgasm.

Be Adventurous

Ask him if he enjoys perineal or anal stimulation during fellatio. If you feel so inclined, accommodate him. If you do not feel comfortable using your finger try a small anal stimulator. This stimulator has multi-speed vibrating. It's made of soft jelly and an has a training tip. If the anal stimulator is too much you can try the Tush Teaser which is a smaller anal stimulator.

Another item you can try are anal beads. We recommend Jel-Lee Anal Delight Pleasure Beads since they come with lube and are made with a soft yet smooth Jel-Lee material as well. These are easy to use and from my experience can increase the intense feeling of an orgasm by 100%. Insert the beads while giving head, ask you partner how many of the beads feel comfortable. Then when your partner is ready to cum you start to pull them out one by one so he has the sensation of the beads while he is cumming. These beads are sure to please!

Swallowing

You are under no obligation whatsoever to swallow. If you aren't comfortable with the idea, feel free to spit it out immediately. However, be aware that the semen will be on your taste buds longer if you keep it in your mouth long enough to find something to spit it into. Swallowing is the most expedient way of ridding yourself of the substance. If you don't like the taste, you can try asking your boyfriend about his diet. While it's true that the taste of semen is affected by certain foods, those foods are different for every person. It's unlikely that your partner will know what's making him taste extra salty that day. Semen will not hurt you if you swallow it. It will, under no circumstances get you pregnant. It won't make you sick (although it may make you queasy for a moment if you swallow on an empty stomach), nor will it positively affect your health. If you put it in your hair, it may help with split ends, but it will probably just make it sticky.

Most men I've talked to say they are really turned off by a woman spitting, and they would rather she didn't take the cum in her mouth at all. I think this issue is more emotional than physical. I definitely think that it is more sexually arousing for a man to orgasm in someone's mouth rather than on a body part such as a woman's breasts due to the warmth, wetness, etc. (although if you are not going to swallow, I would suggest this instead of spitting), however I believe a bigger issue is how it makes the man feel.

It is a kind of rejection when a woman spits, and not only is watching a woman spit just disgusting, it makes him feel disgusting, like there is something gross about him. It turns something intimate into something as casual as chewing gum. I say, if it's already in your mouth, you might as well swallow it. The taste won't disappear just because you spit it out.

Men do have quite a taste to them, kind of like salty chalk, and I can't say that it's appealing, however I think you should try to acquire it, as it can make all the difference to him, and isn't that the point? Our best advice: swallow it and be done with it.

However, none of this will be an issue if you use a condom. Which, of course, you should if you and your partner are not monogamous and/or have not been tested for STDs.

Here are some Quick Basic Tips

Ask your partner what he likes. At the very least, have him say things like "harder" or "slower." If he's capable of articulating his favorite moves, try to emulate them.

Contrary to the term "blow job," most men do not enjoy their partner blowing into their penis.

Women tend to underestimate how much pressure they can exert on an aroused, erect penis. You don't need to treat it gingerly.

Think variety! Lick, nibble, go up and down the entire shaft, flick your tongue across the head, etc. Be creative.

If you repeat the same motion too long, your partner becomes temporarily insensitive to it, so be sure to vary the type of stimulation.

Use your hands on the shaft of the penis, his testicles and on other parts of his body.

Kiss and lick things besides his penis: his testicles, inner thighs, perineum and lower belly are all very sensitive.

On the underside of the penis, directly below the head, is a small ridge of skin known as the frenulum. This area is exquisitely sensitive to stimulation.

Don't use teeth unless he specifically requests it. You can avoid having your teeth graze his skin by sucking in your lips to cover your teeth (pretend you're an elderly, toothless person and you get the idea).

Suction is a much-loved form of stimulation. But don't suck too hard or you'll choke or cause pain.

Try new scenarios: in the (parked!) car, in the shower, in the backyard, in the living room, on the kitchen table. Variety adds spice to life.

If you are kneeling on the ground while fellating, place a pillow under your knees.

If you are fellating someone with whom you are not monogamously involved, use a condom.

These suggestions should give you a start, but experiment and see what you and your partner enjoy. The greatest tip of all is to relax and enjoy yourself. Enthusiasm goes further than even the best of techniques!

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